atlas-bear: #16: Abraham Lincoln Born in a log cabin. His morning exercise regimen consisted of running for miles while carrying two giant logs on each shoulder.  Nicest guy ever. …And he was really funny. Really fucking tall. He was 6’4” Buff as fuck under that suit. Extremely well read. The supreme master of sarcasm. Grew his beard out because a girl he liked said he’d look cool with it. During a debate when one of his opponents called him two-faced he responded by saying “If I had another face, do you think I would wear this one? Was a bigger Atheist than Jefferson. Was tough as fuck. As a child he was kicked in the head by a horse and then he just kinda walked it off. Was a very skilled wrestler. Won the support of a notorious street gang by out wrestling their leader. Upon seeing one of his supporters being attacked at a rally, Abe quickly jumped into the crowd, grabbed the attacker, lifted him over his head, and threw him onto a building. Got so many death threats that he kept all of them in a file in his desk labeled “Assassinations.” FUCK JOHN WILKES BOOTH!

atlas-bear:

#16: Abraham Lincoln

  • Born in a log cabin.
  • His morning exercise regimen consisted of running for miles while carrying two giant logs on each shoulder. 
  • Nicest guy ever.
  • …And he was really funny.
  • Really fucking tall.
  • He was 6’4”
  • Buff as fuck under that suit.
  • Extremely well read.
  • The supreme master of sarcasm.
  • Grew his beard out because a girl he liked said he’d look cool with it.
  • During a debate when one of his opponents called him two-faced he responded by saying “If I had another face, do you think I would wear this one?
  • Was a bigger Atheist than Jefferson.
  • Was tough as fuck.
  • As a child he was kicked in the head by a horse and then he just kinda walked it off.
  • Was a very skilled wrestler.
  • Won the support of a notorious street gang by out wrestling their leader.
  • Upon seeing one of his supporters being attacked at a rally, Abe quickly jumped into the crowd, grabbed the attacker, lifted him over his head, and threw him onto a building.
  • Got so many death threats that he kept all of them in a file in his desk labeled “Assassinations.”
  • FUCK JOHN WILKES BOOTH!

(via jumpandtouchtheskywalker)